The world today is in the grip of ‘FEAR’ and its making people go out of balance a bit. I thought it will be a great opportunity to reflect on the dimension of ‘fear’ and how it impacts our life.
Is there something we can do about it? Or Should we?
Self-isolation and social distancing is increasingly giving rise to a feeling of loneliness in people and feeding ‘wild imagination’. People are imagining the worst for themselves and the world outside.
However, I feel that most of what we fear isn’t going to happen anyway. Our fears are usually not related to what really happens to us. Much of what life hands us comes without the prelude of fear and worry. Our fears don’t stop death, they stop life. More than we care to admit and more than we even know, our lives are completely devoted to dealing with fear and its effects. It’s a shadow which blocks everything – love, feelings, happiness and our very be-ing.
When the dangers are unknown and you seemingly imagine that it is lurking around the corner, you will be gripped with fear. It is like walking in a thick jungle where you constantly are imagining some predator who is out to get you. It sucks the life out of you.
We give so much energy to the fear factor right from early childhood that we see only fear in the future. Our culture sells fear. If you watch TV commercials or programs you will find that almost every 5 minutes reminds you of the dangers lurking around you. How the food you are eating is dangerous for your health; how the water you drink could kill you; how your jobs can be taken away and the list is endless. It is fear that keeps selling; so much so that people have become so conscious to the extent of paranoia about what the eat, where they sleep, when they wake up and so on. But the reality is that what we eat is safe and has got you so far, you will sleep when your body demands of you some rest and you will be awake when you have got enough rest. Most of the so called ‘fear’ could be the result of your imagination.
Why then do you think Insurance companies confidently bet on the fact that disaster will never happen to us and they earn billions of dollar cause of that. The point I am making is not that we shouldn’t have insurance, but the fact that we might as well have some fun playing outdoor sports, going on some adventure and seek out to do things which makes us happy.
Yet most of us live as if the odds are stacked up against us.
The point is that we are afraid of many things in life, such as public speaking, asking someone for a date or even admitting we are lonely sometimes. In many cases we find it easier not to try rather than to be rejected and having to deal with the feelings underneath.
Fears are tricky indeed because they are so well layered, one on top of the other. You can peel away until you get down to the bottom or foundation on which all others rest. And that’s usually the fear of death.
For example; suppose you are afraid to ask someone out on a date; beneath that fear is the fear of rejection, and underneath that is the fear that there won’t be someone for you. Underneath that is the fear that you are not lovable and if you are not loved can you possibly survive? When people have inadequacies the bottom most fear is “I’m not enough”
If you have been with someone who was dying, you would notice that after a point they no longer have fear. They prefer to do things which they always wanted to. Speak or meet someone of their dreams, go out and risk some adventure, not bother about what others think about them. In my own experience, I’ve seen up close some dear one’s on the verge of dying and they are able to smile more than the care-givers.
If you could literally reach into your fears – every one of them and remove all of them – how different would be your life? It will help you to see a different life that is possible.
Happiness, anxiety, joy, resentment, we have so many words for the many emotions we experience; but deep down at the core there are only two emotions – Love and Fear.
All positive emotions come from ‘Love’ and all negative emotions come from ‘Fear’. And mind you, you cannot feel these two emotions at the same time. They are opposites. If you are afraid or ‘fearful’ you are not in a place of love. When you are in space of love you cannot be in the place of fear.
We have to make a decision to be in one place or the other, there is no neutrality. You have to actively choose ‘love’ over ‘fear’ in order to have a good life.
You must remember, only ‘Love’ is in the moment and in the present. ‘Fears’ involve either the past or the future. ‘Fear’ always has a foundation of the past and causes us to imagine what may happen in the future.
To live in the present, then is to live in ‘LOVE’, not fear. We can work towards that goal by learning to love ourselves. Infusing ourselves with love begins to wash away our fears.
Remember, “FEAR STOPS LIFE”! Make your choice.
Logically persuasive and convincing choice, cutting through the mutually exclusive love-fear paradigm! The title is indeed catchy and classic!